Musn't Misinterpret
by anenemies
Summary: Fred and Angelina were a golden couple. Key word, were. After Angelina firmly squashes his heart, Fred hatches a plot like no other. The cure to any heartache; a truly great prank! All he needs is a sidekick and this time George just won't do. AU F/H
1. Chapter 1 Out

"You know what Fred, I'm tired of this

"You know what Fred, I'm tired of this!"

"Awe, Angel you don't mean that."

"Yes, yes I do Fred! I'm tired; I am sick and tired of you and all your crap! We've been going out for three years now, and I always thought; that underneath all the stunts and jokes, you really loved me." Angelina was pacing the back and forth in front of Fred. For his part, Fred was more than mildly surprised at this turn of events. He had come home after a long day at the shop hoping to find his Angel waiting with a hug, some comforting words and perhaps a snog. But Angelina had wanted to go out. There was some party her friend was holding and it was a must to attend. But he just wanted to stay home and rest. Might as well have told her he wanted to get the dark mark. Before Fred had even gotten his bearings Angelina was up in arms and reaming him well and good.

"Honey, Angelina, I swear I do love you! I'm just really not in the mood to go out."

"You're never in the mood to go out! I swear Fred you're ashamed of me!!" Whatever had happened to his nice, peaceful night in?

"Angelina I'm not ashamed of you, it was a long day an-"

"And nothing Fred! You never want to go out; we never do anything _I _want to do!"

Fred was speechless; since he could remember what Angelina wanted, Angelina got. He had never really minded, nothing was too good for his girl, but she couldn't possibly have been ignorant to the balance of power. "It's always the Quidditch match for _your_ team or _your_ family dinners or _your_ furniture in the flat. I'm not even a part of this relationship anymore!" Fred was flabbergasted

"You can't believe that Angelina, you can't possibly feel that way!" He pleaded, still reeling from her statement "This is silly, we're both tired and frustrated… Let's, let's just talk tomorrow. Come on, let's just go to bed." He gives her a timid grin which quickly fades at the thunder in her face.

"I _can_ believe that Fred! I _do _feel that way! I am not tired; I want to go out to Julie's party. But no, you want to go to bed. Let me tell you, I'm not going to bed with you for a very long time!" Fred cringes at her biting tone, eerily reminiscent of his mother.

"Alright sweetheart" he says soothingly "Just let me conjure a bed for the living room."

"No. I want you out of the flat!" Fred stares at her in shock

"What! It's my flat Angie; you haven't helped with the bills since WWW got a second location."

"That's not the point! Just get out; go to George's or something, just don't come back until you're ready for an _adult_ relationship." Fred gaped at her in dismay "Well?"

Snapping out of his stupor Fred straightened to his considerable height and stared down at Angelina.

"Until _I'm _ready for an adult relationship? You wouldn't recognize one if it hexed you in the face! You take absolutely no responsibility for anything Angie. You're like a spoilt child throwing a tantrum because they didn't get their way!"

"Just, just shut up Fred! You don't understand anything. It's not like you're grown up either with your silly juvenile pranks!"

"Silly pranks?" Fred's face darkens at this "Silly pranks are what dresses you in your nice robes and gets you to those parties you love so much and pays for this bloody flat! Me and my _silly pranks_ pretty much own you!" Angelina gasps, drawing herself up to spew her anger back at him.

"How dare you! You don't own me Fred Weasley and you never have!" She hissed dangerously

"Well I do own the fla-"

"That's not the point!" she screeched shrilly

"I'm not leaving!" Fred announced stubbornly, huffing and petulantly crossing his arms.

"Yes. You. Are." Angelina gritted out, Fred could sense the danger approaching but still shook his head. Staring at him penetratingly, she nodded once, abruptly, before turning around, walking into the bedroom, and slamming the door. Fred, looking mildly dazed, eyed up the door to the bedroom. He wondered whether this meant he should just sleep in the living room and was just working up the courage to go ask her when the door flew open with a bang startling him. Angelina strode towards him carrying one of her many handbags.

"Are you going out?" He asked, glancing at the bag.

"No, you are." She chucked the hand bag at him, catching him in the side of the face with considerable force for such a small thing. Curious, he picked up the handbag peering inside only to see all of his belongings, shrunken to fit within the hideously expensive accessory. "Get out Fred."

"For Merlin's sake Angelina I told you; it's my flat!"

"And I'm telling _you_. So?!"

"You can't make me leave!"

"Watch me." With that she whipped out her wand from the depths of her robes and quickly levitated both Fred and her purse.

"Angelina, put me down! Argh!" Ignoring Fred, she floated him quickly out of the flat, out of the building, and onto the street. There with a flick of her wrist she chucked him to the concrete and walked back into the building.

"Told you you'd leave." She called back to him, lying on the slightly damp concrete

"Not like I'd want to stay with you, you cow!"

"You didn't have a choice," she rebutted just as she was entering the building "I don't stick with wizards who can't… perform."

"Hey, you weren't exactly enjoyable yourself love! All I can say is: I spent a lot of nights just lying back and thinking of England!" He shouted after her just as the doors closed behind her. From inside you could hear a highly unattractive, if muffled, shriek of anger.

Grumbling, Fred picked himself up off the sidewalk and dusted himself off. He guessed he was going to be visiting George tonight, but not before some Firewhiskey, swiping up the purse and swinging it on to his shoulder. And so, with an abrupt pop he apparated to the nearest pub.

--


	2. Chapter 2 Revenge

"Forge

"Forge!" George groaned and rolled over in his bed, covering his head with a pillow to block the nuisance that is his twin brother, Fred.

"Forge, I know your there! Come on, lemme in!" And at that point the banging commenced. With great effort George dragged himself out of bed, having heard the familiar slurs in Fred's speech. He could not, in all good conscious, allow a thoroughly smashed Fred loose upon the world. Stumbling through the darkness of his flat, he reached, and proceeded to drag open the front door. There stood Fred, wide-eyed, fist poised to hammer the door once more, and a women's purse perched jauntily on his shoulder. "Forge, I knew you'd lemme in!" With sigh George nodded, turning away from the door.

"Well come on in then Gred. Just let me floo Angelina to come pick you up."

"No!" George turned back, surprised at his vehemence.

"What? After all that you don't want to come in?"

"Naw, of course I wanna comin' Georgie! Jus' don' call tha' _witch_ over here."

"You don't want Angelina to see you like this?" George postulated, trying to find the sense in his brother's statement. Fred nodded firmly at this suggestion, paused; staring blankly at the ceiling, then shook his head fervently.

"No, I don't want to see _her._ Tha'sit!" Fred stated as best he could, grinning at the accomplishment. George was more than awake now, Angelina and Fred always fought but never, ever had Fred not been able to talk Angelina down from the proverbial ledge.

"Why don't you want to see Angelina Fred?" The smarmy grin on his face was wiped away to be replaced by a sudden sadness.

"She dumped me George." He said in a small voice, holding out the purse for George to see.

"So you stole her handbag." He asked, looking at it sceptically "Not the best idea mate. Come on, I'm sure it was just a misunderstanding." He said, taking Fred by the wrist and guiding him gently into the flat. "Tomorrow, you can call her and it'll all work out." Fred shook his head sadly.

"I really think it's over Forge. She… I… _We_ blew it." George shushed him and took him over to the couch where he instantly fell asleep. George then made his way back to bed for some well deserved rest. But just as he slipped away, he couldn't help but think that perhaps Fred was right.

--

"No."

"Come on 'Mione! Please? Pretty please!?"

"I said no!"

He was pacing back and forth in front of her. She kept her eyes firmly focused on the sitting open on her lap. Though if one was observant they'd see that in spite of herself, Hermione stole a look at the irritated red head every once and a while.

"Look," Fred said, kneeling in front of her "You've known me for years! My family knows you, my friends know you; my bloody colleagues know you! There would be absolutely no way any of them would fall for this other than _her_!" He was practically begging now, the gleam in his eyes that only foretold of trouble, was worrisomely bright. Heaving a sigh, she took note of the page she was on and closed her tome.

"Fred, I don't know whether your perspective is being clouded by pain or whether your silly drunk! Or if you're just being Fred… But honestly I have much better things to do than to be your accomplice!" Fred winced slightly, recalling much the same reaction his twin had when he told him about The Plan.

He had awoken the day after Angie had packed up his life and heart in a purse and thrown it back at him, with a ridiculous hangover and a crick in his neck from sleeping on George's crappy couch. Moaning his way over to the kitchen, Fred conjured himself some coffee into a mug that he was fairly sure George had nicked from his… Angelina's flat.

There. At that very moment, the seeds of The Plan were planted. As Fred stood there, in the rather small kitchenette, sipping coffee that tasted vaguely of residual alcohol, he began to contemplate the very essence of his relationship with Angelina and their recent parting of ways. The only things that came to mind were as follows: He still loved her, it hurt an awful lot to have ones heart broken, and, that ultimately both of these things were her fault. As he stewed over these facts, another thought struck him. _Revenge_. Which brought him back to his current predicament.

"You wouldn't be my accomplice. You'd be my partner."

"It doesn't really make a difference Fred." She sighed "I just don't feel right doing this to Angelina."

"So what? You're on her side then?" He glared at her, standing again.

"It's not about sides. I simply don't think this is the best way to deal with your breaking up."

"_We_ didn't break up Hermione. _She _dumped _me_! She's the one who ended it." He said, Hermione slightly winded at the simple pain that flashed over his face in that moment. Like water skittering over the surface of a hot pan, before it was replaced with an all too familiar pleading expression. "It's not fair. She hurt me so bad and she doesn't feel a thing. Don't you see? That's what this is about. I just want her to feel as bad as I do about this." Hermione looked very closely at Fred who was still staring at her eagerly.

She knew. This was, in fact, quite a common occurrence for Hermione, to know. This wasn't a good idea. Already her logical mind had compiled the pros and cons for this particular scenario, the scale she was internally reviewing was reminiscent of when her father and her had played at the muggle park when she was younger, in particular, the see-saw.

To pretend that she was his girlfriend, to show Angelina that he could do all the things she said he couldn't. To show her that she had made a mistake and that she was missing out. All of this showed a high incidence of risk coupled with little to no return on her investment of both time and thought. The idea itself was flawed in her eyes as it seemed preposterous to Hermione that anyone could fall for Fred dating someone such as herself. But looking at Fred now, the rational part of her mind was pushed to the side, replaced by her rather strong maternal streak and her Gryffindor loyalty. She supposed she would do her best to help him.

"Alright Fred, I'll do it." She said giving him a small smile. He whooped loudly, leaning down to pull Hermione up, her book falling forgotten on the ground as he spun her around twice before setting her back on her feet.

--


End file.
